133 Remembering My Ma
Translated from Chinese by the author
"Who made such a point on my son's forehead?"
"What kind of his past karma has he had?"
My mother asked all the scholars she met,
Should he be a monk she was so afraid!
In Temple she asked the destiny of her son,
And the meanings of the fortune-telling poem.
They said, "He will not be a man of common."
But I did not desire worldly fame since long!
She humbly kept the precept of non-killing.
"Who will go back?" in hotel I was seeking.
Some ready-made hen-legs I sent from afar.
Waiting for reply I afraid of missing.
Besides daily food, I sent some extra sum.
Nearby shops had praised her to have a good son!
Offerings of worldly things were not worthwhile,
Sad that death had made her practice a short run!
During my childhood I made her no rest!
When grew up I left her, east and west!
With smiles in tears when she saw me coming back,
Often treated her own son as a new guest!
A son she had but he not served her well.
Left her how many times I could not tell.
When once I came back she was so happy,
Asked me again, "When will you give up travel?"
When she was at her age of sixty,
I invited her to the great city.
With a smile she said, "Enjoy our poor,
Why need to pass such luxury street!"
Afraid of no son to send her when she rests,
Knelt before Buddha, prayed with tears so earnest!
When she was going to die she really saw me,
I was actually in the Tibet-East!
Our last departure had been many years.
She had sent me at village with tears!
Now I came back where she called me last time!
All the cold wind with deep grief I can't bear!
Long since I practiced Buddhism afar!
I still cannot ascend and preach Dharma!
When shall I be able to fulfill the vows!?
I'm afraid to think all beings are my ma!